Tell me we both metter, don't we?

"If I only could make a deal with god and get him to swap our places...be running up that road, running up that hill with no problems"

Kate Bush is brilliant.

I don't know what I feel like talking about, but I feel like talking.

...................................

I have people to talk to, people I could call or see. I dunno what it is, but I have no motivation to contact anyone, and I hate feeling alone/ being alone. Seems contradictory, right? Maybe it is just skipping the middle man. I'd call Derek, or Joe, or Dustin, or Sam, we'd talk for a few hours...kind of a long time...but then we'd hang up. I'd still be here in my red bed thinking about how a phone call is a long way off from a cuddle...and how a cuddle is never just a cuddle...but sometimes you want it to be a cuddle and nothing else. Does this make sense?

I didn't think so...this is why people who think in word salads shouldn't be allowed to have a blog.

I guess what I was trying to say is that at some point I'll end up alone anyway, so why bother putting it off? I'll just stick with being alone right now, and five seconds from now, and five minutes from now, and an hour from now, and so on.

I'm not saying I want to be a hermit. I'm just saying I'm gonna be lonely any way I cut it.

I'm not trying to bitch about it either...I guess it was just something to talk about, because that's what I was thinking about, and I felt like talking.